Okay so I haven’t written in a while. Again. And I should probably just be giving an update and writing my depression part 2. But I’ve decided instead that a rant is needed.
There is a certain stigma attached to epilepsy or any kind of brain ‘problem’, there is no denying that. The amount of questions I’ve been asked before border on straight out rude and pathetic. For example:
*looking at me like I’m contagious* “So, do you, like, convulse and swallow your tongue and stuff?”
no. That does not happen. I then calmly explain that 1) it’s impossible to ‘swallow your tongue’ and 2) I have petit mal epilepsy, I don’t convulse, I may pass out or go blank so please stop looking at me like I have two heads or something. Another one:
“You shouldn’t be driving/walking alone/swimming/carrying your daughter” – ok, so maybe this one is based on some kind of care. But I’m not an invalid, really. I can usually tell when a seizure is coming and I am perfectly capable of looking after my child and driving a vehicle. I’m not stupid, if I don’t feel well I wont do these things.
“So” *person looks at me with wide eyes* “It’s genetic right, that means your daughter is going to be bi polar? and uh, epileptic? Are you worried?”
OF COURSE I’M WORRIED YOU STUPID EFFING NOSEY BASTARD but really what business of it is yours? And do you seriously have to be so tactless about it? Honestly the nerve of some people…
So if my baby girl does end up with the same disorders I have, it’s not the end of the world. I will look after her and walk her through it just as my mother has done for me. For crying out loud it is not a life sentence or something. I’m not broken or contagious or an invalid.
Perhaps I’m over reacting a little. But this is all coming from some people’s complete lack of education when it comes to certain disorders or differences. People are so quick to give you that wide eyed “oh what a shame” look when you explain why it is you’re taking medication or why you’ve been in hospital the past week. Maybe some of them are being compassionate I guess, but the majority treat it as if it’s some dirty shameful problem.
it’s just lack of education I know. But still, I just wish I could say SHUT UP and read a book or something before you give me that look or stupid question or tone of voice.
K so maybe I’m being a little mean here. But that’s my rant I guess.
Sometimes I wonder if I should maybe be more selective of who I share my thoughts and experiences with. I mean I don’t go around telling the whole world my issues and feelings but I’ve decided to no longer hide the fact that I am an epileptic and have bi polar. I don’t spew it out to everyone I meet but if they ask I explain. I’m not going to be ashamed of it.
And maybe I can help spread a little knowledge and understanding.
Anyway. Angry post.
Have a great day all.